Interior Design by Google #plainbarny

Last week saw me deep in the trauma of a bathroom tile dilemma which resulted in my being blacklisted by more than one supplier for abuse of ‘order a sample by post‘. I’d already had a similar run-in with a certain manufacturer of engineered wood flooring.

 

Interior design by Google means a world of choice, literally at my fingertips, but it doesn’t make me an interior designer. So many choices and so many beautiful pictures of stunning interiors created by others but no one to tell me exactly what to do.

I have invented an acronym for the too much choice/not-enough-inherent-style syndrome I am presently suffering from:

FUCUP

(Fear of Uncool Copycat Utilising of Pinterest)

‘Order a sample’  seems to have become my knee-jerk reaction and I have sourced sufficient samples and swatches to decorate a modest bungalow, whilst not actually making any decisions at all.

Now I’m asking the world wide web which doors I should buy.

“Hey, WWW, which interior doors should I buy?”

… and I’m back on the cyber-cycle; surfing from Pinterest to Google with a swim across to Download our Brochure and a dip into Best Interior Design Blogs: ON-TREND IN 2018! (Velvet and variegated houseplants, in case you’re wondering.)

Is being on-trend a good thing? Will we be off-trend in 2019?

I only ask because this is costing us quite a lot of money and … Ah! Order a Sample. Yes. That must be progress.

 

Only oak is too oaky, ash is too yellow and ‘Scandi Horizontal’ is too on-trend. ‘Sand’ is grey (who knew?) and Maple is actually pink in real life. The Farmer won’t let me have plywood (the builders were so disturbed by that suggestion they couldn’t even dredge up a scathing comment).

Maybe I’ll just go white.

Now, should that be Pure Brilliant White, or White with a Hint of Pretentious?

Hey, I’ve got a paint visualiser app on my phone… I can point my camera anywhere and test a thousand different whites… Chiffon, Timeless, Clouded Pearl, Bleached Linen…

 

Hmmm, maybe. Order Tester Pot